Undies

The point of underwear is for people to see it while you are removing it or having it removed immediately before sex. My mom used to think it was to show the people at the coroner's office you were a sensible person as you laid on the slab awaiting autopsy. Everyone's like "wear clean underwear in case you get into an accident." But, and hear me out here, 99% of accidents are going to soil your underwear in some way. Think about that. I'm not getting any more graphic than that.